2001-08-17
�Recently I was sent an email from a religious bigot, trying to persuade
me to 'change my ways' and come to the Lord. The email is as follows ... and
like every good overly exuberant atheist should, I pick it the holy fuck apart
...
.
Jesus Christ believed in a BURNING HELL, that is why He left the Father's bosom
and came into this world of sorrow. He left the streets of gold and the
rejoicing of angels,
�Ok, question ... Heaven is in the after life, right? So when we speak
of a soul, we are speaking of an intangible force that can be neither seen nor
felt. So when we speak of heaven, we speak of a place where intangible forces
go to rejoice. So how the hell can you have streets of gold when streets and
gold are both tangible, earthly elements that can only be enjoyed by the soul in
the present because of our fleshly vessels? hmmmmmmm?
to come to this earth to be crucified, so that you
and I could escape THE BURNING HELL.
�Anyone got a hanky? I think my eyes are gunna tinkle.
�Oh, and if he already died so I wouldn't have to go to 'the burning hell',
then why should *I* have to change when he already took care of my sins to begin
with? You'd think the son of God would be able to get it right the first time.
In LUKE 16:23 & 24 the Bible says; "AND IN
HELL HE LIFT UP HIS EYES, BEING IN TORMENTS, AND SEETH ABRAHAM AFAR OFF, AND
LAZARUS IN HIS BOSOM.
�Obsessed with bosoms much?
AND HE CRIED AND SAID, FATHER ABRAHAM, HAVE
MERCY ON ME, AND SEND LAZARUS, THAT HE MAY DIP THE TIP OF HIS FINGER IN WATER,
AND COOL MY TONGUE; FOR I AM TORMENTED IN THIS FLAME." The Bible says in
MARK 8:36, "FOR WHAT SHALL IT PROFIT A MAN, IF HE SHALL GAIN THE WHOLE
WORLD, AND LOSE HIS OWN SOUL?"
�Dontcha just love when Christians spout off lines from the Bible like
it's actual truth? It gives them comfort and the feeling of intellectual sustenance
without really ever knowing jack shit. Many people of the world today use this
method of mind numbing verbalage: politicians, evangelists, cult leaders, people
who are full of shit ... roughly the same type of people really. They sit there
and talk in short, easy to use sentences, but when it comes to something complex
or unknown, they start pulling out their cerebral peckers and try to jerk your
brain off into a some what lulled trance to where you get lost in what the hell
they're saying, but you agree with anyway because you don't wanna look fuckin
stupid.
One day in HELL, you will not have to be bothered by
some Christian trying to give you a gospel tract. Neither will you have to worry
about a soul winner knocking on your door and inviting you to go to church.
�Thank Hell! Where do I sign up??
No sir, but you will be remembering every
gospel sermon you ever heard, every gospel tract that you turned down or tore
up, each kind word f rom a mother, preacher, or Christian f riend pleading with
you to be saved. You too, will one day be like the rich man you just read about
in LUKE 16: 23 & 24. You will be crying, and begging for one drop of water
to cool your scorching tongue. But it will be too late!
�You seem pretty sure of yourself. Have you been to Hell? Know anyone
who has been there? No? So you're just going by what a book says from a bunch of
guys who wrote about the way things were back when they still believed that the
world was flat and women & children were objects, not human beings ... not
to mention blacks weren't even close to being considered individuals. Now
*there's* an era I wanna learn about spirituality from!
The Bible says in MATTHEW 23:33; "YE SERPENTS,
YE GENERATION OF VIPERS, HOW CAN YE ESCAPE THE DAMNATION OF HELL?" How
about it Friend, is HELL the place where you want to spend eternity?
�If I can get the fuck away from you people,
you're DAMN RIGHT I DO!
The Bible says in PSALM 9:17-, "THE WICKED SHALL BE TURNED INTO HELL, AND
ALL THE NATIONS THAT FORGET GOD." In MATTHEW 25:41 the Bible says; ".
. . DEPART FROM ME, YE CURSED, INTO EVERLASTING FIRE, PREPARED FOR THE DEVIL AND
HIS ANGELS:" You see HELL was originally prepared for the Devil and his
angels. But if you die wicked and cursed, by not being saved, you will be there
with them!
Really? Prove it.
My Friend, don't let anyone convince you that when
you die it will be all over. The Bible says in HEBREWS 9:27; "AND AS IT IS
APPOINTED UNTO MEN ONCE TO DIE, BUT AFTER THIS THE JUDGMENT." God says
judgment follows your death, so NOW is the time to get ready to meet Him,
because Judgment Day could be TODAY. The Bible says in REVELATION 20:15;
"AND WHOSOEVER WAS NOT FOUND WRITTEN IN THE BOOK OF LIFE WAS CAST INTO THE
LAKE OF FIRE."
�It's interesting that God has to use spam email in order to get his
message spread to people. If God is so kool, so all powerful, why can't he tell
me this stuff himself? If he TRULY wants people to convert and to love him, why
not tell them in person? He used to talk to people constantly in the bible. Why
not now? Surely once you see God standing before you, you'd start to believe he
existed, would you not?
�Of course, the argument I have heard to these questions is "God
gives you free will and wants you to choose unbiased." Then why
did he send *you* to tell me? Your statements are completely biased and to deny
so is to be in such a complete state of blind denial, it would make Ray Charles
look like Superman with X-Ray vision.
My Friend, I beg you in the name of Jesus, to turn
from your sinful, wicked ways and claim a new life with Jesus Christ.
�"Yes, join my spam mail cult, my friends! Only through mass
irritating email can you truly be set free!"
One day I too was traveling down the road that
led to a BURNING HELL.
�That's called jock itch, dude.
I thought to myself, "There must be a better
way."
�Tinactin, Lamisil, Lotrimin AF ...
Well I trusted my heart and soul to Jesus
Christ, now I can claim this verse from the Bible for my life; 11 CORIN- THIANS
5:17 "THEREFORE IF ANY MAN BE IN CHRIST, HE IS A NEW CREATURE: OLD THINGS
ARE PASSED AWAY; BEHOLD, ALL THINGS BECOME NEW." Thank you Jesus!
�"Jesus ... he's not just the way, he cures
butt fungus, too!"
HEAVEN or HELL? You do the choosing. If you are lost, and would like to get your
name written in God's "Book of Life", so you can miss THE BURN- ING
HELL, simply trust Him now, and pray "Lord Jesus forgive me of my sins,
come into my heart this moment and save me. Amen."
�What? And miss Hendrix? Fuck that.
